Monday, January 10, 2011

Poop Post #1 of 2011: Crapping machines

And for once, I'm not talking about the dogs! Or myself...

Either way I seem to be talking or thinking a lot about poop lately. Weird. Did you know that Woody and PB are poo-eating machines?? My poo, your poo, horse poo, dog poo, bear poo, coyote poo, baby poo, elk poo (THE BEST, or so they say) they want it all. Ok, admittedly, they haven't tried my poo or YOUR poo, but they would be more than happy to they tell me!! (*wink wink nudge nudge*)

And then there's the rest of the dogs who just LOVE LOVE LOVE frozen horse poo!! Many a time have they come running after I've called them with a mouthful of frozen horse turds. Even better is when they return from those 3am "potty" trips outside (which are really just a cover for Operation: There's horse poo out there calling our names and we must have it NOW!), bringing a lovely almost-melting, slobbery chunk of poo into the cabin.

Ooh, and then when the half-melted poo freezes on their fuzzy faces - totally awesome, especially when they come in close to your face to kiss you! *gag*

The poo production team.

Speaking of poo, I'm in the process of deciding what kind of poop retention system (PRS) to put in here. That's cabin-I've-been-living-so-long-without-a-toilet-I-don't-even-know-what-it's-called-anymore lingo. First I was thinking of septic, but it's so freakin' expensive, I decided to seek a cheaper alternative. And going more eco-friendly is definitely a bonus. Less water usage, recycling waste, blah, blah, blah - it couldn't hurt to find a less expensive, less electricity-using system... could it?

Then I thought of the composting toilet - it SEEMS like a brilliant idea and the awesome videos of your poo magically turning into beautiful dirt and the toilet remaining a lovely white, pristine environment with no smell... almost sold me. Until I talked to people who have them, or browsed some websites and reviews of people who have them. It was Susan's comment to me that originally sealed the deal for me to avoid the composting toilet at all costs. She said something to me that stuck in my head... something to the effect of: "I've been up to my armpits in feces so many times trying to fix the thing, it doesn't even faze me anymore" - GAH!!! Thanks Susan, I never want to get to the point where having feces up to my armpits is a normal thing.

Looks shwanky and pretty but it's really just full o' poo.

So then there's the sawdust toilet - which sounds ok, but it's really just a bucket with a box around it. Like an indoor outhouse really. In theory. But it's simple and you do the hard work (removing said poo to compost pile) instead of relying on the quasi-technology of the system itself. I need to do more research on what people really think. But now you're hauling poo. I could have a massive poo composting pile, but Oh. My. God. If Pooh Bear and Woody got loose into that... I could just imagine coming home to two brown dogs with big *poo-eating grins on their faces. Pun totally intended.

One does have to question how the whole composting system works in, oh, the WINTER - which is like forever up here. But I found a fantastic quote from an Alaskan about using his "lovable loo" for over a year:

"When the 6-gal bucket gets 3/4 full we put it outside for an hour or so to freeze up a little so it's easier to carry out to our compost heap through the snow. Then just tip the bucket up and the poopsicle just slides out."

Poopsicle! Fan-freakin'-tastic. I've often referred to the frozen dog poo as 'poopsicles' but this puts a whole new spin on it. This would be one gigantic perfectly cylindrical poopsicle! Who would wish for anything more from their poo??

Pretty scenery & poop machines.

So I'm at the "ah, screw it, I'll stick to the outhouse" stage again. Anyhoo, I guess I just wanted to talk about poo tonight! Thanks for letting me "get it out of my system"!!! Oh I know exactly what you're thinking mom - "Oh goodness, Stacie is really losing it, a whole post about POO!?! You really needs to get out and socialize with humans more often!" - yes, it's true, but sometimes I would just rather hang out with poo-eating dogs, is that so wrong?!?! :-)

*Word edited so this blog may retain it's PG rating.


Anonymous said...

Are you really mine????

Anonymous said...

Have you really gone round the bend Staci or is this just a bunch of "crap", lol. Gotta say, it is a real concern especially once the big melt hits the fan. Of course by the sound of it you have quite the clean up crew to assist you in your time of need. Had a dog that used to love horse poo too, the vet said that it was because the food we gave him didn't have enough nitrogen in it so that might explain something as he did break the habit once we bought a better quality. Remind me to not let the dogs kiss me if I ever get to meet them. Also, I'm reminded of the saying "be careful of what you ask for as you might get it" when I complained that you weren't blogging anymore, was thinking more about something cute you and the dogs were doing. Just kidding. Love it.

Lauras Garden said...

Only one of my two dogs eat poop. And she only does so in the winter. Kind of a poopsicle I guess.

Fawn said...

AHAHAHAHAHA! You're hilarious! I love this post. Not that EVERY post should be about poo, now. But a the periodical poo-peppered post is... pleasant? No, not quite the right word, but I couldn't think of the right one starting with pee. I mean P.

Matt, Kara, Hunter and Cavan said...

mahahhahaha! What a post!

This makes me so glad I don't have a dog.

And I will think of you while pooing in my nice warm bathroom while you are out (still) freezing your arse off!

Meandering Michael said...

Stacie, is "Anonymous" your mom? Because she's dumping all over you.

Meandering Michael said...

Stacie, is "Anonymous" your mom? Because she's dumping all over you.

dogsled_stacie said...

Anonymous #1 is probably my mom... I aim to get her going sometimes, lol!

Anon #2 - Marg, I have heard about dogs eating poo 'cause of a deficiency in the diet, but I really just think they love it. Luckily most of the dogs have poo preferences and are somewhat picky - ie: not eating OTHER dogs poo (Gracie even avoids poo when running in harness on the trail!).

Fawn - that is great "Poo peppered post"!! I will keep them coming just for you!

Kara - thanks so much for thinking of me while you're taking a dump! I'm flattered... uh, yeah.

laura k said...

Our first dog used to poop and whirl around to eat it. She was an urban dog and it was a race to see if we could pick up after her before she ate it. Totally disgusting!

Great post. :)

tornwordo said...

We watched (in horror) as my dad's chihuahua Maya, snarfled up the other chihuahua Tiki's poop AS IT WAS COMING OUT OF HER ASSHOLE.

It's difficult to erase such images from the mind once beholden.

Anonymous said...

Ok, anyone want to try one of those poo balls to see what dogs are so excited about? Maybe if we just think about them as Master Recyclers it won't gross us out as much.(yeah right)

dogsled_stacie said...

Laura - PB PLAYS with the poo sometimes, it's hilarious as she throws it up in the air, then chases it.

Tornwordo - yep, seen that around here, coming right out of the poop chute!

Anon - erm, no thanks!